Me like Aimee! She used the skin I made! YAY HER. posted by Melike at 22:40
One song memorized, six to go! But I'm not too proud, since this was like the easiest song of them all. GRR. Tonight I'm not going to bed until I memorize three more (well.. wishful thinking). The cover design of this one song is so purdy. I feel like designing web pages and book covers and the like. It'd be so exciting. I've really wanted to design a book cover in a while. My thirst is quenched a bit with BlogSkins. I'm so psyched! So when I first made the layout I liked it, then I hated it, and now I like it again. I'm scared. I'm trying to sever all emotional bonds from it until I get feedback from people. *trembles* Geez I posted a lot today. But oh well, it's fun. I've been writing a lot lately. posted by Melike at 22:29
Yyyyah. So like I wasted a lot of time today, but I just made a blog template and submitted it to BlogSkins. I dunno if it's good or bad yet. I used to like it, but now it's eh. I guess I'll formulate a real opinion when I hear people's comments about it and see how many people actually use it. It's called Rosie. Of course, the only reason I joined BlogSkins was so that I could make layouts for other people to use, because it's so fun. Not like I'd actually use any of the templates there, even if they're the best in the whole entire world. It sort of kills the individuality thing, you know. I can't see any of them expressing me. I rather like my own layouts, each featuring a photo of myself and colorful lines derived from the photo itself. Some descriptions boast things like, "This is the ultimate layout for the individual." Hello - if they were so individual they'd make one themselves. *grins* So that is how I procrastinated on my All-State music practicing today. Hopefully I'll come up with much better layouts once I'm stripped of all other responsibilities and obligations (spring break). posted by Melike at 21:28
Wow, I hear a kid screaming its head off. I hate kids. posted by Melike at 17:14
Noooo. I had a dream last night that it was past 14:00 already (yeah, for some reason I was thinking military time) and I still hadn't practiced my All-State music so now it came true. Well, I looked at all of them once and now I'm too lazy to spend time on them. And that's bad, since they have to be memorized and I have no time. I'm really bored. I hate laziness, it's so dumb. I also get bored when I think of things.. like when I think of people and stuff. Because people aren't all that great. I mean they're all cute in their little ways, but that's when you look at them in a general sense. I wonder if I've turned you into a monster. You weren't like this. Now it's so bad. But maybe you were always like this and I was just blind. But I doubt that. You're certainly different now. posted by Melike at 17:13
Roar, Geocities is so mean. I'm looking for other free webhosts just so I can upload a damn image that I'm going to become soopah-famous with. posted by Melike at 15:13
Friday, March 08, 2002
Yaaay today ruled! Okay, well, choir wasn't as fun today, but just about everything else was. But some very disgusting things happened in choir. *grins* Anyway, in 3rd period we had a substitute for chem, and so did Mr. Gaida's class (just across our room). So after roll, I ditched chem and went to AP Bio to play Tron the whole period. Andrea went to my chem class and pretended she was me. I was sort of paranoid for the duration of the period, but it was very fun. I played with Garrett, Roger, and Sean, mostly. Then, when Nick came to play, Garrett kept yelling, "Tonga!" to throw people off and was laughing hysterically. It was a bit weird. But fun! Aiiii!!! Then, in 5th period, after making silly jokes and making people laugh, I went up to the cluster of people standing around the computer, watching the four people playing Tron. It was so sad, because Kiyoshi kept dumping little cups of chalk into Kazim's hair! Kazim looked like he was 30 years old with his "graying" hair, but I dusted off his head while they were playing. We joked around a lot and I made the guys laugh a lot. It was soo fun, laughing hysterically in a big warm group. It was so funny when Kiyoshi dumped another pile of chalk on Kazim's head, and I blew it so there was chalk dust everywhere. That sent everybody reeling with laughter. It's nice to be accepted into an atmosphere like that and when people appreciate my silly humor. I love guys! Today after school was fun too. My piano teacher had gotten new cats, and one of them came and sat next to me while I was playing. I also started to laugh when it started licking itself or something on a part I was trying to concentrate on. HOW CUTE. I took short petting breaks in between. *grins* Maan, I want a furry animal living in my house to pet. I discovered that I like petting and caressing living things.. well not plants. Humans and animals, usually. But, you know, there aren't many humans for me to caress in that way. *grins* Yeah, furry animals are nice to pet (that includes humans). Muahahaha, no wonder I like guys with big hair! Hehehe, j/k. So then I went to an elementary school to help with the setting on a school play. The little kids are so cute! They're doing the Wizard of Oz and the 5-year-old scarecrow is SUCH a talented singer, omg. Aimee and I were thrilled. I think he'll be a bass when he grows up. He just looks like one. Also, hanging out with Jocelyn backstage was fun. I made her laugh a lot and she made me feel very funny and interesting, something I hadn't felt in a while. In fact, I think you're the only person who makes me feel unique and fun to talk to, Jocelyn. I love you for that. *grins* ME LUB! *imitates Garrett* Ohhhhhhh, me like!! posted by Melike at 23:15
Thursday, March 07, 2002
*gets excited, then decides to go to bed* posted by Melike at 23:58
So like, I'd said that I hated kids, but I might waver on that thought after tonight's one-hour-long community service (even though it was a bit too long). But bear with me as I tell the story. The ending's really cute! So I got there, and I didn't know where to go, and they sent me to this room full of little kids and made them sit around a table. They said that there were limited computers and video games in the other room, so those who cooperated during this little exercise would get to use the computers. The guy in charge, Jerry (I'd gone to Red Cross a few times in 8th grade and I know him from there.. but good thing he didn't recognize me), asked them what they'd done in the past five weeks, and they all went down the line and said humorous responses, like, "I went to school," and "I watched TV." Then they laughed wildly. But then, the people in charge (I think the lady's name was Christine) condemned the three girls to stay behind while everyone else played in the other room, because they weren't respecting the others while they were talking. And there was this tall and skinny, red-haired college guy named Elijah (who reminds me of Aimee's alligator named Jeremiah.. and also of the song and Mr. Rhodes's Elijah quote) came in once in a while and told people to clean up the mess they were making. So anyway, I was left with two other adults who sat there and talked amongst themselves and played with legos at one point, and three little girls. One of them was a spitting image of Erin Tait. She grabbed my hands to play slide, but then she noticed the huge green amber ring on my finger, and she wore it for a while and showed her friends. Hehe. I remember I used to love big clunky jewelry, too, and it's cool that now I have possession of lots now that I'm older. *big grin* Anyway, people grabbed my hand and dragged me around to sit with them or play bubbles and stuff. At one point they tackled me to the ground and everything was out of control, but then the Erin girl (okay fine, I think her name was Arielle) told the other bitchy girl to get off so I could sit in a chair. Then they fought over who got to sit in my lap (painful - I will remember to tie my hair back next time). So, like, this other girl is really bitchy. What a spoiled brat! And guess what her name is!! *sighs* Ironically, the evil girl's name is Bianca *imagines Jocelyn laughing her head off as she reads this*. Anyway, finally, when they all calmed down, Arielle told everyone else how great she thought I was and the others agreed (I don't know why.. I didn't do anything.. all I did was stand around, smile, and let myself be dragged around like a rag doll). Then they all thought I looked like that girl in Princess Diaries. *evil grins* You know what advantages that brought me?! My nickname was Princess from then on (although one of them called me Diary.. then switched to calling me Princess) and they wanted to treat me like a princess (i.e. do everything I tell them). So I made them pick up the chips from off the floor. *cackles* Man, those kids eat chips like machines... just stuff them into their mouths like they have a bottomless pit for a stomach. But anyway, then we played with bubbles and that was fun. So then, the little girl (she was SOOOO adorable, omg) hugged me and I let her sit in my lap, then that idiot Bianca came and tried to sit in my lap too and she hurt the other girl (she was five years old.. omg I just wanted to munch on her) and so the other girl (damn it I forgot her name! I'll call her Alicia for now) started to cry so they took Bianca away into the other room (YES!!). So then, everything went smoothly after that.. Alicia sat in my lap and Arielle and I tried to do a Scooby Doo jigsaw puzzle but we counted the pieces and noticed some were missing, so yeah.. we stopped doing that. By then, my hour was up anyway and I had to go home. Before leaving, this girl I hadn't talked to gave me a drawing of.. ME! In a lil princess outfit! And it said to: Princess from: Tera. I was so happy! IT MADE MY DAY!! I thanked her and I was so giddy and she just walked away and I decided to surprise her next week by drawing her something too. Muwahaha. But then on my way home I noticed that I'M GOING TO BE IN ALL-STATE NEXT THURSDAY. I uttered the f-word to myself while I was walking home and now I'm crushed. Damn it, I'll give it to Andrea to give to her or something.. I WANT TO SURPRISE HER! She is so artistic.. like she sat there and just drew, and it was really pretty, too. And she had a toy camera around her neck and took random pictures of people and things. She reminded me of.. well, me. And when Arielle (the Erin girl) was picking on Alicia and saying she was jealous because I wanted to do the jigsaw puzzle with her, Tera got mad at her and said that some things she said were hurtful to others. It was very inspiring and I just wanted to take her home with me and draw all day long. But then she'd think I was weird. So yeah I was happy. Man, kids are so great. They thought I was pretty, too! It's so nice to be around people who don't really judge you at all, and all you need to do to please them is just.. sit there, I guess. *shrugs* And I don't think I'd be a good parent because I really can't control kids. I mean, I usually do whatever they want me to do, but when it comes to things such as "Alright, now pick up that food before doing anything else" or something they usually don't listen. Also, this girl stole Alicia's chair and Alicia came up to me and held my arm and pouted and said, "She stole my chaiirr!" and I turned to look at the girl who did it and she glared back at me and Bianca was staring at me with a gaping mouth too, and all I could do was shrug. It was really pathetic. I need to work on that. Bah. But I think they liked me. *feels giddy* Okay, so yeah that was a nice little change from monotony. Roar. Sometimes I feel like I'm just stuck here and I can't meet any new people or have anything different in my life until I go to college. Cuz, like, geez, who is there to meet? People in school have their own friends already. I don't even know if I want new friends. I just want something pleasantly different, and I don't know what that is yet. Phew, I rambled on too much and I haven't started my All-State music, so... er.. maybe tonight I'll start? Maybe. Haha. I think I'll wait until the weekend, actually. posted by Melike at 23:06
Sometimes blogging brings me endless joy. Wow, I wanna see which blog gets more hits, this one or the choir one. I also want to see what keywords people type in to get there. Mwahahaha fun!!!! I'll go do that right now. posted by Melike at 20:16
Wow so like, muwahahhaa, sometimes weird people find my blog by typing in weird keywords. Somebody got to my page through the keywords "my bikini" and another person (just today) came from "legs crossed foot tucked." Haha. Just goes to show the weird things I talk about here. But hey, as long as it gets more hits, it's fine with me! :P j/k Ahh today I'm still very impatient with people. It's really sad because sometimes I say stuff that hurts people. But I really get sick and tired of people just coming up to me and talking to me when I don't want them to. Goo awayy I do not care! Either present a new concept into my life or don't bother. Speaking of new concepts, ummm.. *grins* Never mind. Haha, it's just that people want to set me up with this guy and he has adorable hair. YEAH, like hair is the only thing that matters in a guy. Mwahaha. I think I'll pass. ROAR I am so mad!! In my dream I composed something REALLY COOL, but when I woke up, all I remembered of it was that it was in the key of A. Haha, maybe if I sit at the piano and put my hands over some keys I'll remember. But err, probably not. Nooo it makes me mad though! The only times when I feel composer-like is while I'm taking a shower or in the morning while I'm getting ready for school. And I can't just sit there and write it out, or play it or something. It drives me insane!! *yawns* Well, I'll write later. posted by Melike at 20:10
Today was the wondrous Requiem concert.. well, I should say the Masterworks concert, but it seems as though the Chamber Singers' Vesperae was overshadowed by the glory of Mozart's Requiem. That's so sad, because I loved the vespers. It's so cute! Besides..... its orchestra was far better than ours. *grins* Which brings me to my point. I used to not care about whether the person I liked even knew me or not (anyone remember 9th grade?). But now, it's so important for me to have them come up to me voluntarily to talk to me, even though that sounds strange and pathetic. *scratches head* It IS. I started liking this guy, knowing that he'd never have feelings for me, now I'm sort of sad over it. Grrr, why! I don't even know if I like him. In fact, sometimes I don't like him. But whatever. Maybe he'll go away if I stop thinking about him. I've become so self-conscious of everything I say that so many things I say sound so dumb to me. Like these random sentences I blurt out as a joke or a random comment and nobody gives a damn. Nobody even hears. It's really sad. Then I'm reminded of those people that I think are dumb, and how they act the same way - to tell you the truth, that's when I hit the low point of the day. And what's the point of talking if nobody's even going to hear? Sometimes I wish Aimee were always at my side because she's the only person who truly makes me believe that I'm a part of something, even though I'm not most of the time. Thanks, Aimee. The others, well there are a few who try, but that's okay, you guys. I know there are other people you'd rather talk to, who have many more interesting things to say, or who make funnier jokes and say better things. I'm sorry, now leave me alone. I'm stuffed to the throat with burgers and fries and I don't think I'll be eating breakfast tomorrow.. ughhh. Also, our English teacher gave us this really impossible (and crappy) research homework and I really don't want to do it. At times like these I want AIM because I feel lonely at night, but I know that if I did come online right now, nobody would be on, and seriously speaking, that would take me down to a new level of self-pity. So I'm glad I don't have AIM. My mom got this new thing for my hair and it makes my curls look sooo cool! They're like little slinkies or coils or something, and it looks like I've done them with a small curling iron but I haven't! Tis natural, baby! Also, Tom's getting a haircut on Friday but that's sad because I found that out right after I told him that I liked his hair today. Lawson told me the bad news. I looked shocked and sad, and they laughed at me. Tom and Lawson are so cute. And so is Jesse, who was sitting next to Tom, and Alexa with her weird faces. Alexa has such a cute face. Anyway, ugh, I don't know, I just might not do this English homework today. Maybe I'll use my freebie if she even checks. I really can't concentrate while my head is throbbing. *stumbles away* posted by Melike at 02:54
Tuesday, March 05, 2002
Okay, so I'm not spouting out hatred anymore. *grins* I got back from a choir rehearsal a while ago and it was fun. Also, I found someone who actually talked to me (besides Aimee and Sally and Soha). He's going to be in Madrigals next year! I'm psyched, because he's a great bass. Woohoo! So yeah, now I'm happy. I'm also giddy from seeing someone else, but we all know who that person is so I'm not putting it in writing. *smiles* Yes! It is time! To.. START LOOKING AT MY ALL-STATE MUSIC! Hopefully I'll memorize one song tonight, though I'm planning on going to bed at 9:00 so we'll see. Tralala! Life is grand! posted by Melike at 23:07
For the past few days I've been sitting in class quietly, getting mad at everyone around me:
Why do you talk, imbecile? You ask the dumbest questions. Shut the hell up so we can listen to the frigging teacher because what she's saying is so interesting. Wow, I guess your brain only functions while your mouth is flapping. You're really modest, you know that? And why did it occur to you to say hi to me all of a sudden? What are you staring at? No.. please don't say hi.. please don't say hi.. please don't sa.. damn.
Things like that. It's a really retarded thing. I should spend my time worrying about more important things. It's not a nice feeling to sit there and build up hate for whomever seems to be sitting behind you all of a sudden. Roar. But then there are nice moments, like the guy who was the first person today to ever make me smile. I love you, dear! Alas, live is a big spinning whirlpool which absorbs you into the center and that's when you finally die. .. wow. I'm so poetic, huh. Hah. posted by Melike at 19:27
Monday, March 04, 2002
Today, while Jocelyn and I were just standing around and I was playing with Jocelyn's arm by squeezing it at different places, Garrett walked up to us and stopped right in front of us. After staring at Jocelyn's arm for a while, he said, "You guys are weird," and walked away. But it wasn't as funny as when he declared that he was going to "dispose of his nitrogenous wastes" before he left the room. I also rather like being called Me Like by Science Bowl guys now. Jeff and Garrett call me that.. it's like a nickname of endearment now.. it makes me feel all fuzzy inside. *big silly grin* posted by Melike at 23:13
I haven't made a cg in a long time.... in fact, let me check the last time I ever made one! .. ah, which reminds me, I gotta friggin change this layout. I have an idea in mind. Believe it or not, it's much more simpler and stuff. But grrr, time issues! But hey, maybe I won't wait until All-State is over. We shall see! Okay, so, like, August 28th of last year was when I last made a cg (this one). I really.. grrr. If only I could draw, man! If only I had a comic would I be able to fully enjoy drawing again. Sadly, I have absolutely NO comic ideas at this time (and I think I never will) because the ideas I used to have before.. well sure they were ideas but they were DUMB. I'm SMART now (hah). Anyway, I have weird aspirations at the moment and I know none of them will come true. Well.. we'll see. Argh.. I'm turned off from piano practicing these days.. but I'll go do it right now. posted by Melike at 21:09
Sunday, March 03, 2002
While at Science Bowl, Emily and I spotted a nerdy couple - an Asian girl with glasses and a nerdy looking kid with big curly brown hair. They were both wearing suits, and the guy's arm was always around the girl's. They were so cute!!! The guy was pretty hot, actually. Well, okay, the word "hot" doesn't describe him that well. He looked - handsome. Man! I get a fuzzy sinking feeling whenever I remember them. posted by Melike at 23:39
Oh, and guess what.. yesterday at JPL, Garrett accidentally broke a piece of aerogel (the least dense solid in the world). It feels like styrofoam, but it's really light. The glass display case wasn't locked or anything, so we keptng it and poking it.. and Gaida was touching it while Kazim was holding the lid, then Garrett poked it and a piece broke off the end of the L! (They'd made three blocks of aerogel that said JPL.) Then everyone (including Gaida) ran away giggling and laughing hysterically. It's so sad. This is the school that won. Our B Team was the loudest and most obnoxious team ever.. who would have thought that we could have gotten so far, into 5th place? Hehe! Man... it must be sad, though, to prepare for a competition for a year and not get 1st place. Hopefully we'll win again next year too.. I really really hope we do. posted by Melike at 15:15
Man! I'm going to bed right now!! I am soo tired, since I've been awake since like 5:30 this morning. SCIENCE BOWL WAS SOO FUN! A Team got 1st place and B Team got 5th place!! (Yeah, we thought we'd do much worse, but 5th place is really good! We were the best B team that participated!) Wow!!! I knew our A Team guys would make it! They weren't even defeated once. They won all the rounds! Oh they are so great! But in the last few minutes the only thing that would determine who won was a couple of points, and Jeff saved the day by buzzing in right before time was called, so they got the 4 points, then they did the bonus and as soon as Kazim said, "sixteen?" into the microphone, the game was over and everyone was cheering. Our A Team got sweatshirts and everything, and we got goodie bags. We also got lots of pictures taken.. it was really cute. Yaay Science Bowl! Man!! I wanna participate again! (Well.. I will, but next year. Grr.) Then we went to eat and we were there for like three hours, and it was all very sciency bonding and stuff and I was happy. Now I'm dying of fatigue and I think I'm going to bed. I can't believe our school got first place! That is so cool!! They're going to Washington D.C.!! *gets really excited* As for me, I'm proud of some of the answers I gave. If I hadn't sleepily glanced over my notes last night, I wouldn't have gotten the question where they asked which organism had two pairs of legs on each part of its body (millipede - but of course it didn't say "two pairs of legs per section," it was a scientific name or whatever). Haha. And the sour cherry question. Man! I'm so happy!! So no homework has been done yet.. I'll have to sort all that out tomorrow.. grr. Tomorrow's one of those homework days again. posted by Melike at 02:06
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