"Jeat jet?" - Franklin, from
Nine Stories by J.D. Salinger
"Primeval bubbles surfaced it with lethargic majesty as Billy Pilgrim stared." - about soup, from Slaughterhouse 5 by Kurt Vonnegut
"What would you do if you were interested in heredity, had several kinds of purebred peas, and also knew how to cause cross-pollination? No, pea soup is not a good answer." - my biology book
"O flesh, flesh, how art thou fishified?" - Mercutio, from Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet
"Page! Where's my cider?" - King Sven, from Aimee's play
"Mi abrigo est‡ en la estufa. Es un pastel muy bueno." (My coat is on the stove. It is a very good pie.) - Kupi
"I'm not the kind of person to fish things out of the refrigerator." - me
"I like bread and butter, I like toast and jam. I like just about all these things, and that's why I like Spam." - Robert
"Jocelyn's a GRAPE!" - me
"I wish I was a Japanese girl so then I could be skinny.. cuz then I'd have to eat Japanese food all day and I wouldn't eat it because I don't like Japanese food." - Andrea
"What is it with your parents and grapes?!" - me
"I'm a fat little dumpling." - Andrea
"B-but...it's yummy! And good for you...chock full of lemony goodness and vitamins and mineralies, only you can't see them." - Aimee
"Today I set chocolate on fire in the microwave. It was quite amusing." - Jocelyn
"I almost had a nervous breakdown while I was making guacamole. What a stupid dip. And avocados aren't even that good for you. I stormed out the room while my Mom screamed, 'It's just guacamole!!'" - Nicole
"Shut up and eat what I give you!" - my mom, to my dad
"I'll bring food.. for myself!" - Jaden
"If you wish to make an apple pie truly from scratch, you must first invent the universe." - Carl Sagan
"As cows are one of the leading causes of the green house effect (methane gas), I believe it is our right, nay it is our sacred duty to eat them." - Brent
"Mmm, love those complex carbohydrates." - Jocelyn, while eating spaghetti
"Cheeseburgers are cute!" - me
"One time when I was little, when my mom asked me what I wanted for dinner, I said, 'You! I wanna roast you on a spit and eat you for dinner; except, I'm really hungry and it'd take months to roast all your fat off.' She didn't really like that." - Aimee
"I was eating a ham sandwich yesterday and I thought of you." - Aimee
"If you touch this, you have the same fate as the hotdog. Depending on the current, you can be well done, medium, or rare." - my physics teacher
"I dunno, never been to Oregon. I like oregano, though." - Chris
"Sorry, my mom likes to season my vegetables." - me
"That car is so cute, it looks like pistachio ice cream. It makes you want to lick it!" - my dad
"I had V8 for the first time in my life today. It was a blast." - me
"This apple stem tastes like tea." - me
"I can't get my thoughts together while I'm staring at the rice. I look at the rice and see images of rice fields in my head." - my dad
"Okay. I'm bringing in the knife." - me, while eating nachos with a fork
"I ordered pizza today under the name of 'spoon.' They spelled it wrong." - Sam
"We're going to eat ice cream after we consume our 40 meat patties." - Steven
"There's shrimp in this mussel shell, but not mussel!" - Steven
"Maybe this onion doesn't like doing telophase." - Mr. Gaida
"Let that marinate in your head for a while... like tomatoes!" - Mrs. Rubin
"I had a dream that I had chocolate chip cookies.. but then I found out that the chocolate chips were ham." - me
"That's funny, because all of you (Melike's kin) are from Turkey, but we eat Turkey. So, we celebrate by eating non-celebrating cultures. I love dog hangers." - Jonathan, about Thanksgiving
"One day I was choking on a shrimp tail and I seriously thought I was going to die." - me
"You think I pay people that work at my pasta factory? Come on now, let's get serious. I'd be losing quite a chunk of my Barilla profits. It's called STEVEN'S PHAT-ASS ITALIAN RESTAURANT&BAKERY." - Steven
"My mom bought me cheese and crackers today, and I was joyous." - Jocelyn
"We don't have much time. Charles, hurry up and eat that sausage." - Steven
"Hey, Charles didn't finish his sausage!" - Steven
"Ah... I see how it is, I'm up at midnight rapidly losing sleep time, and you're looking at berries." - Sam
"Cavewoman, woohoo! Let's go catch a rabbit and cook it with taters." - Andrea
"Yeah I just ate a box of chocolates. I was trying to be healthier like a healthy diet thing, but then it got cold, so I gave up." - Andrea
"I'll come over and make you a quesadilla, ya little woman!" - Steven
"Well, my cat is el pollo loco." - Gus
"Hey, getting fat for me is easier than even you, Melike. If I like smell food, I gain a pound. ITS HORRIBLE!!!!!!! lol, jk. Have a nice-ass day." - Steven
"Good night, my fellow potato!" - Andrea
"I only bake on weekends, so there!" - Jocelyn
"Sam, just ignore the rule that states a guy can't hit a girl in those kinds of situations. I mean, we're talking about ice cream here. ICE CREAM!" - Carl S.
"This water tastes like scrambled eggs." - Steven
"Sorry, I'm too busy thinking about steak." - Steven
"Who you callin' a cookie! You damn pretzel! Yeah that's right.. I called you a pretzel. How do you like that?" - Rusty
"He looted the house of all the maple syrup." - Tom, about Reed
"I think I just ate a potato taco." - Steven
"My grandfather killed my aunt's baby lamb when she was young for a Passover dinner." - Avi
"The Serengheti scientist has dwindled in numbers in the past three decades due to poaching. As a result petri dish-grown crab flesh production has sharply dropped..." - Reed
"i just woke up and i smell like mad lima beans." - Reed
"Sometimes, I like to put green grapes in my belly button. They fit perfectly." - Christa
"I want to put an Inka Corn in my belly button, grapes have grown old. Or an Aztec nut. I wonder if it would hurt. Probably not if I put the round side in." - Christa
"You can take my bread, you can take my mustard, but you can NOT take my avocado and my pupusas!" - Mr. Rhodes
"I did get the gifts. And I ate all the brownies and cookies immediately." - Mr. Rhodes
"Haha you don't mention everything about your dietary habits... 'Not a picky eater' hardly hints at the extent of your diet." - Reed
"I call that: lunch in 20 seconds." - Robyn
"Who wants to come over to my place this weekend and eat lots of food?" - Gus
"A gay guy spoonfed me pie!!" - Aimee
"Mr. Rhodes threw his already chewed beef jerky out the window because it was 'too soft and chewy, ew? gross! This is not jerky. Ew, gross.'" - Mr. Rhodes
"You're like ketchup on th eburger. E-BURGER! It's not even real." - Reed
"I ate four apples at 1:29am. They were small." - Robyn
"Sometimes it feels weird taking a big bite out of a big juicy tender piece of chicken. It's like primal or something." - Chris
"YES! I GET BAJA FRESH FOR DINNER! Bahahahha. Or rather, I should laugh, 'bajajajjaja.'" - Christa
"I ate four brownies today because I was sitting next to them." - me
"Yesterday Mr. Rhodes got food on his tie, and I pointed and laughed." - Christa
"I tried to be anorexic a couple of times but I went home and ate a quart of Coldstone banana ice cream." - Ilana
"Today my parents reminded me of ants. They were acting like these deprived critters just walking around looking for food around the house." - Steven
"I think the sushi made me horny. *ponders*" - Chris
"Oh Melike. Oh, oh oh. Last night, this kid asked me, 'What is soy?' I died. Two or three times actually." - Christa
"Hi I'm Genghis Khan. I'll be your chef for today." - Jonathan
"Did I tell you that on Sunday I got so hungry that I went to Subway and ordered a foot and a half of sandwich and ate it all? Aren't I cool?! I was laughing while I ate it, because the 'cool' guys next to me thought I was a pig." - Christa
"I feel like cream of wheat." - Christa
"My roommate laughs at me for always talking about food and being hungry. I kind of do mention peanut butter at least thirty times a day." - Christa
"My roommate's friend, for graduation, he got like 2 Costco size boxes of Orvilles microwave popcorn. There's like a hundred packs in a box, and he didn't want it so he gave it to us. So now we're living with popcorn up the ying yang." - Steven
"Mm paprika! In Transylvania they just throw chicken paprika at you by the bucketful." - Reed, when he saw my coral necklace
"Mr. Rhodes bought me peanut butter and never sent it!!!!! I'm hungry!" - Christa
"That was Mr. Rhodes on the phone; I was demanding my peanut butter." - Christa
"How's the food at MIT? Our food is pretty good except for today. I walked up to one station and it was a guy serving this Indian meal, and it consisted of some weirdass chicken with this potato and bellpepper mixture which really tasted like burnt rice. Now get this: these peas and mushrooms in this really powdery curry sauce, and this really bland rice with tasted more like raw flour, and this really dry piece of chicken which sucked and was dark meat and I'm more of a breast man. So yeah you can imagine how pissed off I was after eating that crap. And by the way, I did eat it. I was hungry and finished it all, I mean I paid for that crap." - Steven
"I had really good juice today, and I made it myself from mango juice and hot sauce." - Steven
"MR. RHODES IS COMING TO TEXAS AND HE'S BRINGING ME AVOCADOS... OMG." - Christa
"Well I'm eating hummus and pita naked right now, but if you give me a few seconds I'll be more prepared to handle that." - Christa
"Wow. I'm actually full after one serving. Cool." - Jonathan
"Is seaweed good for one's teeth? Because I just ate twenty sheets of it... alone." - Reed
"Hook me up with some cherries, yo." - Astro
"I'm so shallow and callous! and loving it! Okay, and not lovin' it so much. This ain't no McDonald's food." - Reed
"I like being a vegetarian. It's fun and interesting. It's like a treasure hunt, all the time." - Christa
"Eat a burrito for me, will ya? Or quesadilla, cos that's the #1 Melike crave cause." - Reed, out of the blue
"Yeah my mouth has chocolate chip head slather aftertaste. Uhgh! I didn't barf, but my roommate threw the chocolate chip muffin at my head and it exploded in a shower of chocolate chips. And the taste was impounded into my brain. I interpreted the taste without the muffin ever reaching my mouth. Totally couth." - Reed
"Vegans shouldn't be living. Vegetarians should eat vegans." - me
"Been eating like crazy because it feels good." - Jonathan
"Some people turn their nose down at non-Starbucks coffee. Those fools must be re-educated in camps." - rstevens
"Ew last night, they put pine nuts in the food and didn't tell me, and I'm super allergic, and I woke up suffocating." - Christa
"ALL I DO AT HOME IS EAT." - Christa
"Punctuation reminds me of puncturing something, and the word 'academia' reminds me of Macademia nuts." - me
"I suggested I make guacamole and we eat chips and salsa and watch a movie with all the drummers. It's really all about me wanting chips and salsa. CHIPS AND SALSA MELIKE. I would give up my nakedness right now for chips and salsa, Melike. I need to start wearing clothes while I talk to you." - Christa
"My dad is mailing me the rest of the food that I couldn't take back here, and in it is.. CHIPS AND SALSA. AHHHHHH!" - Christa
"Ohhh, do you know what I forgot to bring? Powerbars. That way if we get caught in the blizzard we can still survive!" - Jonathan
"Aw, I was mean to Jose. Well, he was arguing with me about MY food." - Christa
"My friend Renee at Brown wants to rule the world so she can own vegan food companies and stick a big thing of pork in the middle." - Phil
"OOOO I feel like In 'n Out, even though I don't eat meat. If I did, I would want some." - Christa
"Then we went to Quincy Market and roamed around for a while while my dad complained about how his smoothie drink was not pure fruit juice like he had expected." - Ling
"Yes, god is not provable, and yes, Newton's laws do seem pretty set in stone, but who the fuck are we to decide the laws of the universe just because an apple decides to land on some asshole's head?" - Lawson
"If it's tolerable, just swallow it." - me
"The egg is not spherical. It is egg-shaped, or oval." - Prof. Virk
"With 95% confidence I can say this is yours." - Dayan, while handing over a burrito
"I'm like a waffle whore." - Marta
"I ate a dozen donuts today! Assorted!" - Ron Ron
"I don't think all this stuff you wrote is going to fit onto an apple." - me
"We're gonna hang out! We're gonna eat boba EVERY DAY!" - Reed
"We can have an Old English House where we can meet and drink meade and eat meat off of sticks." - Reed
"Holy crap, I just ate Skittles like it was my job." - Tulasi
"Okay, stop eating my saliva." - Dayan
"Come with the hunger to eat a steak the size of a toilet seat." - Jose
"Drinking out of the same bottle is fine. But if you're licking a chicken strip and sticking it in his mouth, that is NOT okay." - Jonathan
"I wanna put my head in your lap, but I don't want clam chowder spilled on my face." - Max
"You relish in the torment of others, as if you didn't have enough pickles already." - Jonathan
"Fruit is so sexual." - Tulasi
"BOBA. Please. If we don't... I'll have to tear my hair out and burn it on the altar of endless sadness." - Reed
"The only problem with salad is there's too much green stuff." - Max
"Do you get pressurized under boba?" - Reed
"It smells like bugs at first, but then it smells good. Smell the bugs! Do you see them crawling?" - Reed, about tea
"I buy them [sushi] so I can look more cultured than the Texans." - Christa
"A food bath. I'm hungry and you iz delicious! Oh yeah!! Let's quench our hungry together, my food bath." - Reed
"Ugh so hungry. I'm like the kind of hungry that is no longer just, 'teehee, I'm hungry.' It's like I might freak out if I don't eat. Ya know? I want a taco, specifically." - Christa
"MELIKE, CHINESE FOOD. Orange chicken! Even though I don't touch chicken, I want the sauce. Orange tofu! GAHHH! SO GOOD! SO GOOD FOOOOD. Time to look on the dining services website to see what's for dinner." - Christa
"I made a roasted chicken breast seasoned with Cajun spices with lemon juice, sliced, and laid over a bed of lettuce with a thin slice of French bread. It wasn't just lettuce, by the way; the salad was made up of arugula, spinach, romaine, and that purple crap, can't remember the name. So it had some sweetness, some bitterness, and some tastelessness. Oh, and I forgot about the few cherry tomatoes. And the touch, just a touch, I mean literally miniscule addition of some olive oil and balsamic vinaigrette I made with some orange zest. I'm trying to watch the figure." - Steven, when I asked him what he had for dinner
"I was reading this sh*t on WeightWatchers.. All these people were like, 'Yeah, you can eat pretty much anything as long as it's in moderation.' It was infuriating. I was like, 'You freaking fat-ass, if you're trying to lose weight, you don't eat cheesecake in moderation.'" - Steven
"That's why people are so fat. The body doesn't need a freakin huge burrito the size of my cock with a heap of Spanish rice and 3 ladlefuls of beans topped with half a pound of cheese." - Steven
"Um, there was a sesame seed sticking to my butt." - Christa
"[I made] buttered sourdough toast with sliced organic tomatoes. I just started and the keyboard's mouth is watering, or maybe that's just spilled tomato juice." - Reed
"You're so sweet and tender.. mostly tender, like meat. Tenderized meat." - Jocelyn
"Yeah, I had to think about ice cream to change my thoughts to something good." - Phil
"If people were at my house, and they asked for figgy pudding and I didn't have any, I'd shoot them all." - Aimee
"We can have a desert... crepe... I mean dessert crepe." - me
"Ow OW ow ow ow OW ow ow ow! ..It's a little piece of the bruschetta." - Christa
"I think I am losing my soul, because the other day, I ate chocolate and I was like, '..This is no good.'" - Reed
"Bring food. I have wine, chips, and dip, so bring a little meat with you." - Avi, about his barbecue
"We'll toss food into your mouth if you stick your head out the window. Orange chicken, it's the perfect size! We could toss chow mein but that'd get too messy." - Jocelyn
"Okay, so like, I ate a lot of food this weekend and today, and I gotta poop, so I'll be right back." - Chris
"She gained sooo much weight. I feel bad, but I don't really, cause she ate the food." - Christa
"I had the best Thai milk tea boba yesterday! I almost cried because you weren't there." - Reed
"He might have issues, but he makes damn good potatoes. Mashed potatoes, baked potatoes. I love potatoes. I said, 'If potatoes were people, I'd marry one,' and he said, 'That's a deep-ass love.'" - Christa
"When I clap my hands, it smells like steak!" - Dan
"I grub on my retainer sometimes. It's tasty." - Tim
"I'm lactose intolerant, I'm spicy intolerant... I'm life intolerant." - Reed
"One of the sickest I ever felt was when I ate a double-double, fries, a large milkshake, and then I went to Krispy Kreme and ate two donuts." - Jocelyn
"Okay, guys, there's honey mustard dripping all over my..." - Marta
"Eat food. That's always stress relief... unless you're really overweight, but we don't know those people." - Marta
[on what's in the garden burgers:] "...crushed beetles and the blood of iguana!" - Debashish
"My mom didn't give me enough protein." - Ron Ron
"Can we bring condom-flavored cookies?" - Debashish
"I try to avoid [sweetener]. I'd rather get fat than get cancer." - Justin
"I'm such a cereal person. I haven't had cereal for two days and I'm tripping already." - Cherelle
"I'm glad my standards for women are higher than my standards for food." - Ron Ron
